To preface this post...
I do understand that we choose to protect the innocence of our children more then modern standards. However, I am not apologizing for this. My husband and I know it is a mandate to do so and to raise up a generation that is pure of heart and also wise. Understanding that every choice has a consequence weather good/bad, long or short term. Please understand we are not condemning anyone for how they raise their kids, this is simply a discussion! Thanks for taking the time to read and discuss!!
My hubby has been reading "Raising Real Men" by Hal and Melanie Young. Last night it brought an interesting discussion to our night time routine. How do we protect the minds our our boys from the harmful images of scantily clad woman in media (ie. tv ads during acceptable programs, at the check out at the grocery store, on the news). Even this morning on the national news there was a story about 8 year old girls and their dance competition version of "Single Ladies" by Beyonce. I didn't allow my almost 12 year old son watch the short clip they showed or even hear the discussion.
We are pretty open with our kids. Offer them insight into the hows and whys of most of our decisions about their upbringing. We want them to understand the decision making process to protect their hearts and minds! We do NOT discuss the ins and outs of certain issues with our children, but why we don't is always an open topic! Please note the key word in the sentence above...children. When the time is appropriate we will discuss everything with them.
Last night at dinner we had a conversation about a book that our oldest was reading. The newest in a series we have never been thrilled over. Nothing terrible, just not edifying and lends his imagination to things unnecessary. He mentioned to me yesterday, that he was having weird dreams while reading this new installation. His father and I encouraged him to look at what he was reading and how it was effecting him. Was the material worth the dreams? Did he understand that he needs to be extra sensitive to the material that he reads because he was blessed with a VERY active imagination? We ultimately left the decision up to him, but encouraged him to choose one of the other two books he has in the cue on his night table. This morning I asked him about it. He did not have issues in his dreams last night and sheepishly admitted to understanding our concerns.
Then there are the physical images that began this discussion last night between my husband and me...My young son's heart and imagination are bombarded EVERYWHERE!! Do you have a daughter? Do you want her husband comparing her to these images? I don't!! Do you have a son? What is your take on the oversexualization that is so prevalent today? What do you do to protect your family from it? This is an open discussion. I do want and value your input. Please remember to be tactful in your comments! And thank you for taking the time to comment!!
8 comments:
sorry about the highlighting in that section...don't know how it got there and can't seem to make it go away :(
Jenna,
I think this is so true. My 15YO and I just had a similar conversation about a video game he wanted to buy. It's rated T, but still contained violence that just seems so unnecessary. Walking down the street we see girls sending messages that they don't understand, boys receiving them with their 15 yo brains and not knowing how to respond to them. It's been hard to watch him try to decipher all this - and TV shows like Family Guy that even if they aren't allowed to watch are still discussed at school, at ball games and sports practices. All I can hope is that we have instilled the values that we hold dear, and that those values and principles rise up from the back of their minds when the time comes. I believe sheltering our children as you and your husband do is so wise. Sheltering our children from making sound decisions, from accepting personal responsibility, or from standing up for what they believe in is not wise. Sheltering them from ideas, images and concepts that they are simply too young to be able to handle - wise. :-) Once NB's Police Chief said to me that our children leave here to go to the High School and are so naive he worried about them. I don't. I think they are naive where they should be, but wise and strong where they need to be. Great blog.
I deleted my previous comment because it seemed too prideful on my part.
Without the pride this time:
TacCom and I TRY to show the example of those who go to the Lord in all situations.
And a lot of prayer!
for us we of course limit what their eyes see as much as possible. And I do what Sue does...we show the boys anytime we see and notice someone who's exhibiting godly behavior, etc.
As it comes along we will focus with them on the compassion side of it all...we do this now but don't yet specifically note the sexual stuff...but how so many are crying out for God but don't even know that's what their doing. When a girl has her body overly exposed she is looking for something. She thinks it's a boy's attention, (which she does want) but deep down it's God's love. This factor rings true in a lot of areas -- when the boys see bullies at the playground, when they hear about alcoholism, etc...they know that those behaviors are a symptom of something that is missing in those lives that is much bigger -- God and knowing that they are loved by Him.
Hope that helps and good for you for being bold enough to blog this...proud of you for speaking out on it!
Great book; great discussion. There is no such thing as overprotective parents. Bring them up in the way they should go....
I find that I personally cannot read or watch anything scary without it affecting my sleep. I will wake up having very disturbing and scary dreams. If I, in my 30's, have so much difficulty then I truly believe it is wise to protect your children.
There are a couple of very popular series of novels that have been made into movies that I could easily get up on my soap box about. I find it scary that young children and teens are being desensitized to some pretty serious "creepy" things.
thanks paula ;)
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